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Post by Duchess of Lashes on Nov 24, 2005 22:30:22 GMT -5
It took a while for this one - Jim meets the Sullivans - but I have finished and posted Chapter Seventeen of Before There Was Darkness both here and at Fanfiction.net at the following link: www.fanfiction.net/s/2510488/17/Feedback, here or there, would be so appreciated! LongLashes |
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Post by bjobsessed on Nov 24, 2005 22:41:25 GMT -5
Well done! I think you captured the tension on Jim's part very well. Christie's mom was exactly how I pictured her--a little stuck up, although maybe she'll turn out ok in the end.
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Post by rducasey on Nov 25, 2005 8:02:54 GMT -5
Lori, I have been waiting for this, so glad you are continuing it. I love your style of writing, especially the descriptive language. I can just picture their home, and all the fine furnishings. How about that Lillian, asking Jim if there's any future in a NYPD job? What a snob. Too bad Christie couldn't find a "Jake" like her sister did. So good, don't make us wait so long for more. And thanks for that Thanksgiving present.
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Post by shmeep on Nov 26, 2005 11:04:22 GMT -5
I finally got to read the finished product just now (it's hard to wrestle the computer away from The Boy sometimes). Well done! Stewart wasn't exactly what I expected, and I love that. He's more 3-dimensional and therefore will be harder for Jim to figure out. Does he have a little of the Clay Simmons smarminess to him? I think I got a vibe.
I love the Blue Room. I could see it vividly in my mind as I read your description. Now I really need to know what happens so get cracking on Chapter 18!
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