Why did Terry shoot himself?

[mlm828]

maggiethecat said:

But you can, I think, argue by implication that Terry kept up his facade about the bank with Internal Affairs, his new partner and the men he worked with; since he was still on The Job, I'd say that he was able to sell his lies to everyone but Jim and himself. So he might have been able to sell them to a shrink -- or the shrink saw through him and and it was all covered by doctor/patient confidentiality.

Jim's job was on the line with Galloway and Galloway's report. Would Terry's job have been in such a precarious position if he'd gone for counseling after being involved in one traumatic event? Probably not, not unless he walked into the man's office in an obvious state of distress.

All by way of saying that PTSD may have been a factor in what drove Terry to shoot himself . . . but let's not forget good old-fashioned guilt and Terry's desire to look like the hero he wasn't.

Yes, I agree that Terry kept up his facade and was able to sell his lies to everyone but Jim and himself. I even think that he may have sold them to himself, to the extent necessary to keep up the facade. I wonder if the strain of keeping up that facade also played a role in driving him to shoot himself. The strain would have been that much greater when he is working with Jim. Not only is Terry forced to confront the consequences of his actions every time he looks at Jim, he also knows that Jim knows the truth about what happened that day. This must have increased the pressure on him exponentially.

Here's something else that just occurred to me. When Fisk asks Jim if there would be a problem for him, working with Terry, Fisk's manner and tone of voice seem to indicate he thinks there's something odd about Terry asking him to check with Jim. As far as he or anyone else (except possibly Karen) knows at this point, there would be no reason for Jim to have a problem working with Terry. So Fisk must be wondering why Terry made such a request. I assume the request was written in so that the rest of the squad would know there was a problem, leading to Marty's question about "bad blood" and Karen's later questioning Jim about what happened. I wonder what Fisk thought of all this, especially after Terry fessed up to "accidentally" shooting himself. After all, Fisk was once a detective, too.



Edited to add the screencap, which kind of shows what I'm referring to. (Note Marty looking and listening with obvious interest, too).

[maggiethecat]

Too much to chew on for a quick response, mlm, but thanks for the screencap. What has always struck me about that scene as well is the way in which Terry holds back before approaching Jim in front of everyone, waiting to see how Jim reacts to what Fisk is saying.

Have we ever discussed whether part of Terry's anxiety might have been due to whether or not Jim ever told anyone what really happened at the bank?

Ooh.

[mlm828]

maggiethecat said:

What has always struck me about that scene as well is the way in which Terry holds back before approaching Jim in front of everyone, waiting to see how Jim reacts to what Fisk is saying.

Good point. After their conversation in the Pilot, Terry has every reason to hold back.

maggiethecat said:

Have we ever discussed whether part of Terry's anxiety might have been due to whether or not Jim ever told anyone what really happened at the bank?

I don't think we have discussed this, but it certainly is possible. However, at the time of "Up on the Roof," I think his anxiety would be more about what Jim might say at that time or in the future, rather than what he said in the past. It seems to me that if Jim had previously said something about what really happened at the bank, there's a good chance Terry would have heard about it. So it would be reasonable for him to conclude Jim hadn't told anyone -- at least no one in the NYPD. He may have become less anxious with the passage of time, reasoning that the longer Jim goes without saying anything, the less likely it is that he will say anything. But now that he knows where Jim stands ("We both know what happened that day . . .") and Jim is back on the job, where the subject might come up, this may be the time for him to become really anxious about what Jim might say.

[Dreamfire]

I've been riveted, reading all your takes on this. I think there's heaps that is spot on.

One line that always get's me from this episode is Terry saying "Thanks for being there for me, Jimmy."


Is Terry projecting what he wishes for?

What I saw was Jim running up to the roof worried for Karen. Yes he places his hand on Terry's shoulder and says "It's going to be okay. Just hang in there." but that's about all the support I saw.

When Terry thanks him Jim makes a grim (almost disgusted) face, nodding. "Heal up."

Leads me to wonder if Terry is just escalating what he needs to do to get some attention from Jim. He's tried the phone calls, he's working with him on a case, he even tried cornering him in the locker room, but Jim does not really accept any connection. He rebuff's him, keeping it civil but clearly refuses any intimacy with Terry. Perhaps in that moment, withe gun, the fleeing perp he wondered if this would be enough to get Jim to recognise him?

Reminds me of that game people play on kids. Ignoring them and pretending they are are not there. We've all seen children who don't get the positive attention they want and start to do things to get at least negative attention. (I'm not saying Terry thought for a moment that he would get caught by Jim BTW)

What do you think Terry mean by "Thanks for being there for me, Jimmy."?


Natascha

[hoosier]

That one line does kind of stick out. Jim's first words when he hit the roof was to call for Karen not Karen and Terry. He did put his hands on Terry's shoulders, comforting him in a way he probably would have comforted any cop under similar circumstances, and his generic 'heal up' could have been for a complete stranger not a friend and partner of three years. I think Terry was pathetically grateful that Jim gave him the time of day and didn't completely turn his back on him.