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Jokes
Mar 27, 2007 20:15:43 GMT -5
Post by Eyphur on Mar 27, 2007 20:15:43 GMT -5
Haha. love the lightbulbs (or was it light bulbs)?
I love the find X picture too. Someone has that for their avatar on a Numb3rs board.
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Jokes
Mar 28, 2007 11:57:10 GMT -5
Post by inuvik on Mar 28, 2007 11:57:10 GMT -5
Ha! Love the group lightbulb jokes, especially the one about the lurker. I just have to give you karma for those. Thanks MLM!
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Jokes
Mar 30, 2007 14:06:34 GMT -5
Post by mlm828 on Mar 30, 2007 14:06:34 GMT -5
Here's something else I just had to pass on, courtesy of a colleague on my legal list serve: Now I really, really have to get back to work.
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Mar 30, 2007 16:20:36 GMT -5
Post by Chris on Mar 30, 2007 16:20:36 GMT -5
Now I really, really have to get back to work. Really? But this is so much fun ;D I think Bozone and Ignoranus should be actual words they seem very useful to me... Take care and keep smiling - Chris aka DUMBO
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Jokes
Apr 10, 2007 13:52:59 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Apr 10, 2007 13:52:59 GMT -5
Silly, but funny. Do this:
1. Go to google.com 2. Select Maps 3. Select Get Directions 4. For your starting point select New York, NY 5. For your destination select Paris, France 6. Get the directions 7. Scroll down to #23
8.Hope you enjoy the laugh! If you do, pass it on!
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Apr 10, 2007 14:07:47 GMT -5
Post by krissie on Apr 10, 2007 14:07:47 GMT -5
I tried typing in Chicago to London last week. That was pretty amusing, too. And I've just made a discovery... Try putting in Aberdeen to Lerwick, Shetland. The instruction "Slight left at Regent Rd 215 mi" could be made a little clearer. Like, um, mentioning that what "Slight left at" really means is "get onto the ferry" to make the sea crossing! They don't just leave out the ferries on this route, either. I've looked at a couple of routes on the west coast of Scotland, and Dover-Dunkirk. Krissie <who loves maps... and Google Earth >
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Apr 10, 2007 14:21:14 GMT -5
Post by shmeep on Apr 10, 2007 14:21:14 GMT -5
Funny! Did you notice that it will take 29 days 7 hours to get there? I found that amusing as well.
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Apr 10, 2007 15:03:41 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Apr 10, 2007 15:03:41 GMT -5
Funny! Did you notice that it will take 29 days 7 hours to get there? I found that amusing as well. Let's do it!!!!!! ;D
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Apr 10, 2007 15:24:26 GMT -5
Post by Chris on Apr 10, 2007 15:24:26 GMT -5
How about we meet half-way??? ;D - Chris
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Apr 10, 2007 15:29:36 GMT -5
Post by Chris on Apr 10, 2007 15:29:36 GMT -5
I tried the ferry from Denmark to Germany, same thing. "Slight right to merge onto E47" - Well this part of E47 is open water so I would suggest you got onto the ferry!!! - Chris
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Apr 10, 2007 16:10:49 GMT -5
Post by krissie on Apr 10, 2007 16:10:49 GMT -5
I tried the ferry from Denmark to Germany, same thing. "Slight right to merge onto E47" - Well this part of E47 is open water so I would suggest you got onto the ferry!!! - Chris This almost makes a twisted kind of sense when you think about it. We drive on the left and take a 'slight left'. You guys drive on the right and you take a 'slight right'. But water is water, which ever direction you take to plunge into it. Krissie
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Apr 11, 2007 7:39:53 GMT -5
Post by Chris on Apr 11, 2007 7:39:53 GMT -5
This almost makes a twisted kind of sense when you think about it. We drive on the left and take a 'slight left'. You guys drive on the right and you take a 'slight right'. I just karma'ed you for this, is does make some kind of twisted sense But water is water, which ever direction you take to plunge into it. And a bit too cold to go swimming yet. How come they want you to swim the Atlantic when they on other occasions forget to tell you about the sea at all?? Because The Atlantic is so big, you can't miss it?? Or do they simply expect us to be driving so fast that we can "fly" the car across the sea??? - Chris - I think I'll just stay home for a while
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Apr 11, 2007 10:24:37 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Apr 11, 2007 10:24:37 GMT -5
How about we meet half-way??? ;D - Chris Okay! Yaye!!!! I'm going to Europe and I shall purchase pretty baubles, visit art galleries and sip espresso at an outdoor cafe! I'm so happy.......
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Apr 11, 2007 11:44:45 GMT -5
Post by Chris on Apr 11, 2007 11:44:45 GMT -5
Oh-oh, I better go buy a new swimsuit for this - Chris
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Apr 19, 2007 14:17:57 GMT -5
Post by inuvik on Apr 19, 2007 14:17:57 GMT -5
Just got this. I had to take out the funniest stuff, which was local, but this is still good even without it. (This explains the missing numbers, for all you eagle eyes out there!)
The New Rules for Driving
2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On them, you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a landing at the airport. Anything less is considered "Wussy".
4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second. However, Hamptons, SUV-driving, cell phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot.
6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can get you shot.
7. Road construction is permanent and continuous. Detour barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and more construction starts everyday. (Too true here, not really funny! Inuvik)
8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats, deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, cats, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage, squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally activated."
11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 kph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off" accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
12. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and blankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is virtually non-existent until the spring thaw.
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